This is the subject line of an email I sent Aron yesterday: AHHHHHHHHHHH!
A combination of pre-Boston nerves and a disturbing five mile run put me in a tail-spin. I traveled down to LA for a two day work event and while there, I wanted to make the most of my time and take a quick morning jaunt around the city. Unbeknown to me, my hotel was close to the infamous Rodeo Dr., so I made my way to the popular area to get my sweat on. The scenery was glamorous and the weather was superb, but my legs were like small children refusing to cooperate.
I trudged through each mile as if I had never run before. Almost instantly, my legs felt heavier than ever, my body was nagging me to give up, and my energy was simply draaaaaaaaaging. Cue the minor breakdown: Oh my God, am I not ready? Did the multiple 20+ mile runs on the treadmill do me a grave disservice? Did being sick three times during the training cycle ruin me? Or what about my lack of miles in mid-week training? All of my fears started compounding exponentially (did that make me sound mathematical? I hope so – ha!) and resulting mind games ensued. My mind was a frantic mess and the run was weak as it was, so I threw my hands in the air and decided to take my time snapping iPhone photos along the way. I’d figure this mess out later.
Later that afternoon, Aron came to the rescue, putting me at ease by reminding me that this is what happens during taper and is why it’s called taper – hello! I’m going to trust her on this one as I haven’t quite had a taper like this before. Instead, I’ll try to quell my fears and make the most of the final days before Boston. I’ll run to keep moving and my legs awake, but it will be fun, pressure free running according to the taper schedule. But I’m curious, what happens to you during taper? How do you handle it?
This also brings up the larger question of do you ever actually feel fully prepared for a big race? To me, the type-A inside always wins and I never actually feel fully prepared. I agonize over the work I’ve done, if it was enough, if it was what I should have done and what I could have done differently. I won’t lie and say that I’ve discovered the secret of confidentially feeling prepared. But what I do continue to work on to this day is looking ahead and accepting that life happens.
Yes, I didn’t get in my 10+ mile mid-week runs. But that’s because I have a job that I love and I work like a crazy person for. That’s life.
Yes, I only did minimal speed work on the treadmill. But that’s because I commute and instead of running in the dark by myself, I put safety first. That’s life.
Yes, sometimes I opt for couch cuddling instead of cross training. But that’s because I’m engaged and want to enjoy this special time with Chicken Face. That’s life.
Life happens. Running happens. And the only thing we can do is keep trying, keep looking forward and keep on keepin’ on.
Day 91: Can’t remember
Day 92: 5 miles
Day 93: 6 miles
Day 94: 14 miles
Day 95: Travel
Day 96: 5 miles
Day 97: TBD