My dad always reminds me, “Life is about the journey, not just the goal.” This weekend I relished the journey and the small successes. Fist pumping silently ensued.
On Saturday, my aerobars asked me on a romantic rendezvous through Mines canyon and instead of fretting about whether or not I was saying or doing the right thing, I just did what felt right. And would you look at that, when I stopped thinking and just started doing, I actually enjoyed my time in aero…well, except when I tried taking off my arm warmers, but that’s a different story. Regardless, we’re now going steady and I can’t wait until our next date.
On Sunday, I made an even bigger baby step as I vowed to face open water swimming again. I won’t lie; when I woke up on Sunday I would have rather spent the morning pounding my forehead against the wall. I literally thought of every excuse of how I would put it off until this afternoon, until next week, until the grass grew about three inches longer. Then I told myself to man up and just get it done, with the caveat being I would go early before any of the group got there and I could just do my own thing.
The scene of the crime.
After wiggling into my wetsuit, I reminded myself that this was not the time to swim to the “rock pile” and back (the same 1,600 meter swim I did the first time that goes far into the reservoir and caused the panic attack). Instead, I was going to stay in the lane lines where I could see the bottom, where it wasn’t too foggy and my mind thought it would be “safe.”
Awkwardly taking horrible self-portraits pre-swim.
As I got out into the water, the first thing I did was put my face in and blew bubbles. I sat there for probably five minutes just practicing my breathing and calming down, and you know what, it worked. From that moment on I simply swam and whoa, shocker, I didn’t die! First open water baby step COMPLETE! Next up, immersing myself back into the “Oh my god I can’t see anything!” open water swim zone. I’m still anxious, still scared, but I know that taking each piece at a time will ease me right into it.
While each of these small happenings may not seem like much, to me their baby steps that I’m proud of and all part of the journey.
What baby steps were amazing parts of your journey this week?
Love your dads quote! I used that philosophy today while running my first half marathon today, The Flying Pig! I decided this past winter I wanted to run a marathon (Columbus in October). The pig half is part of my training. Cincinnati is super hilly and it’s a hard course. I ran a smart, comfortable pace instead of pushing myself too hard in the humidity and had an amazing race and soaked up every second. That was my baby step. Good luck with your training!
Congrats on your half, Jessica, and your journey to the full! Take in every moment – you’re first marathon will fly by!
Those are big baby steps! And as I continue to read about your open water swimming I know my baby steps are on the way. I ahve my first open water swim in aboiut 2 weeks! Scared to death for sure, but i know it needs to be done. My 1st tri is in less than a month! Thank you for sharing the part about just sitting there and putting your face in the water and blowing bubbles. I am going to do the same thing.
Keep up the hard work! Can’t wait to read about the rest of your journey!
So many people have the same fear of open water so you’re not alone that is for sure. Way to face your fear .
I hear ya on the open water swim. I totally freaked out my first few times. In fact, I did my first sprint of the season yesterday (and it was a pool swim) and even that freaked me out. Full on panic attack, had to take a break. It happens to the best of us. Lots of swim practice, lots of swim practice, and just breathe. That’s what I keep saying.
The OWS thing just takes time. I freaked out yesterday morning and I love OWS!
Everything will be fine. Just don’t think about the Creature from the Black Lagoon.
Way to go! I think those are really big baby steps, and I’m so glad you had a good experience. I remember thinking I would never be able to get comfortable on my aerobars, and now I can’t imagine riding without them! Swimming in open water can actually be really fun! Sticking your face in and just breathing for a few minutes was a great idea. Another thing that helps is to just close your eyes when you’re face is in the water. You don’t need them open then anyway, just open them when you site. It is largly a mental thing, and even after doing who knows how many tris I still have to really talk myself into staying calm when I get out there. I feel bad for the people who did the St. George IM this weekend with the huge waves! I had the biggest panick attack in that very lake under those same conditions. I was so close to getting out! Here’s the link to it if you want to read about it: http://fasterthanpete.blogspot.com/2009/01/st.html
So anyway, the more practice the better, and at least you won’t be going into it cold on race day.
Great job Page!
It may sound crazy, but when I started doing triathlons five years ago here was my thoughts on what was a tough training session:
Swimming – 30mins in lap pool at 24hr in Concord. That place is not even a lap pool, and I had to swim around the water aerobics participants.
Biking – Riding from San Ramon down Iron Horse Trail to Livorna and back. I’d leave the hill on Bollinger Canyon Rd as a climbing day.
Run – Wednesday night Danville runs. I’d consider the 6mi loop my long day.
So…… We all need to start with baby steps in order to be able to start to make longer strides.
Since then, I have swam from Alcatraz multiple times, completed 2 Devil Mtn Doubles (206mi), and a few marathons.
And now, I get to be apart of the great group of dedicated, hard working, “goal getters”, insane triathletes called Ironmen. You will, too, come November.
The sooner you get those baby steps started, the sooner they’ll be old news and you will be joining other IMAZ athletes, like myself, on swims around the Shadow Cliff Triangle Loop. Yes, you will be doing the Triangle with us.
Keep up the training and I really enjoy reading the progress in your training weeks. Great stuff!
Eric
Congrats! You are conquering fears left and right. Sounds like a great training weekend. One of my baby steps was the first time I went down this TINY hill near my house on my road bike without pumping the breaks. You should have seen me approach this hill when I first starting riding. It is literally 300 feet long (yes I google mapped it) and probably a 6% grade and you would have thought I was riding off the top of the Empire State Building I was so scared. Now I laugh when I ride down it because I was so ridiculous to be scared of it, but at the time it was my biggest fear. Crazy how your perspective changes!
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good for you! it’s all about the baby steps : ) just think how crazy it will be to look back after IMAZ at where you started and how far you came!
okay so I’m a MAJOR germ freak and open water swimming is my hell. Cloudy, green/brown water everywhere in my face and mouth? IN my mouth and nose???? Seaweed touching me? FML. The only way I’ve gotten through open water swimming is counting. I count to five or ten by strokes every single time. Somehow it gets me through it. I think count, count, count .. okay.. count count count .. anyways, you get the idea. It somehow passes and I forget that while I wont even touch an interior bathroom doorknob with my bare hands (thank you paper towel!) I have now let brown murky water in my nose and mouth. GROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.
but we do what we gotta do right?
)
Love reading about your tri training. Swimming in open water freaks me out too. Great job. Hmm. Ran first 2 miles 3.5 weeks postpartum. Felt so awesome!