Last week I was one of “those” people.
You know them. That person who tweets ambiguous things or laments their woes via social media. Yup, I was that person. Twice.
I think I tweeted because of the amazing lil’ community we have online and the immense amount of support we have for each other. All of your tweets and emails made a world of difference — thank you for that.
As you may have noticed, I’ve been a little quite on the blog lately and to be honest, it’s partly due to frustration. Here’s a bit of a status update: After taking almost a month off of running because of my knee (with the exception of Vineman and some other smaller runs), I was more than ready for my knee pain to be gone. But last weekend the pain was still there — I had to cut my long ride in half and I was to aqua jog instead.
Then, after 20 minutes of looking like an idiot sharing a lane with two other people, aqua jogging, and forcing them to swim around me, I had to get out because I could feel my knee tightening up. After I got out, I could feel it. It wasn’t a sharp shooting pain, nor was it throbbing, but rather it felt like the muscles on the inside of my right knee completely clamped up and tightened into a little, SOB ball. WHAT THE HELL?! I was aqua jogging! This isn’t supposed to happen!
I stood by the bleachers sopping wet for about five minutes while every negative thought filled my head and I began to sob. With tears fully flowing, I proceeded to stretch my knee out which actually helped it feel back to normal, then got in my car and cried some more while muttering all of the following…
I don’t know how I’m going to do this.
It’s all over.
It’s peak training time and I’m missing it.
I still have so much more endurance to build.
Why is this happening?
What did I do wrong?
I won’t be able to do it.
I can’t do it.
I’ve failed.
At one point, my tears had dried out and I was only left with my pitiful depression. But as soon as I talked to my coach, I could feel the tears coming on again and I had to cut the call short so I didn’t babble like a baby while on the phone.
Like clockwork, the tears dried out again and I hoped a good night’s sleep would help settle my soul. Not so. I woke up in a depressed funk, had one of my worst swims yet, cried in the shower, got in a fight with Chicken Face because I was being a depressed idiot, and you can see how the pattern went on.
It’s now Sunday afternoon and while my mood is much better, I’m still terrified of what then next four months will bring. I know that I am at fault for a lot of this. I should have been stretching more, strength training more and taking better care of myself. But with my old quality of life, I only had a certain amount of time per day to train, so I would choose the workouts themselves above anything else. Now I am paying the price.
I am also honest and realize that in the grander scheme of things, I’m still very lucky and this is what I would call a #firstworldproblem. But it’s still very important to me and am struggling through it. I’m sticking to my recovery plan of RICEing, stretching, and strengthening, and am going to see a new chiro (insurance reasons) tomorrow morning.
I wish I could say that my attitude has changed or that I found some secret to it all, but I suppose the only thing I can do right now is be patient.
Le sigh.
BUT! In other good news, the winner of the Gatorade Pro Chews giveaway is….
(Drum roll please)
Congrats on your 5K and winning the giveaway, Sara! Please email me at twentysixandthensome{at}gmail{dot}com so we can get you your prize!
Here’s to patience and happy running…
No – “THOSE” people are the ones who post things like “Life sucks FML” or “Could things get any worse?” and then refuse to ellaborate when everyone is like “Ohmigosh what’s wrongggg?”
Anyway, I’m so so sorry that you are still having so much trouble with the knee. SUCKS. period. You seem to be doing all the right things and I wish it would just work for you and freaking cooperate already.
Keeping everything crossed that you see some major improvements soon so you can get on with your training. Hang in there, girlie!
Oh man, Page. That sucks.
I think it’s just so scary since it’s your first IM, the great unknown, and you want to go into it as prepared as you possibly can.
You said it right- just try to be patient. It’s not easy, but hopefully it’ll be strong and pain-free soon! Good luck with the chiro tomorrow.
Injuries are the worst, and I’m sorry you’re still dealing with this. I hope patience, the new chiro, and all the stretching and icing come together quickly to make it better.
hang in there!
I’m sorry about your knee Page
Just remember, getting through stuff like this and dealing with the mental challenges that come with training for a big race is just as important as the training itself. Besides, look at your “Past Races” list on the side of the page – you have to scroll to see the whole thing! Think of all the tough spots you’ve gone through in training before and how you’ve come back even stronger. You can do it! All you have to do is believe in yourself. And foam roll 
If injury has taught me anything, it’s taught me patience…and to know that you will get through it and come back. I won’t necessarily say come back STRONGER because I have yet to witness that myself, but you’ve come a longgggg way in your tri training, so even though you feel like you still have a long way to go (an Ironman is nothing to sneeze at…), you have a great base and a great attitude to go with it. Now tell that knee to shape up…
Injuries just plain suck, there is no way around that… and to happen in the middle of training is even suckier. Hang in there though, you WILL get through this and are taking the right steps to get back out there ready to tackle the rest of your training. Try your best to take advantage of your extra time, spend it in the pool and doing strength training, etc. Hang in there <3 <3
Ugh. SUCKS.
You can get through it though! You are strong! Just be persistent with your RICE.
You got this!!
I think we all go through it at some point and we learn how to treat our bodies when training so hard, everyone is different
Injuries SUCK. No getting around it. You’re allowed to bitch and moan and complain a little. Don’t beat yourself up about being sad. It’s a totally normal reaction. You’re doing GREAT because you’re picking yourself up and trying to do everything you can to get better. Keep up the RICE-ing! Hang in there!!!
I know it’s hard to see the bright side right now, but as everyone else has said and you said yourself, it takes time to heal.
The good news is, you are four whole months away from the Ironman and you have been putting in some great volume already. Your endurance is already really high just from the fact that you can run a 3:31 marathon. You did great at Vineman and I know that with a bit more rest, your body will recover and come back even better. I have faith in you – come race day you are going to be unstoppable.
I know this is hard to hear, but be patient. You don’t know yet. You still have time. It can still happen!
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Well thats just downright crappy and unfair. BUT you’re doing what you need to do, AND taking all the right steps to get back there and back at it HEALTHY. Being patient sucks, and it involves us doing things that go against all of our natural instincts. I’m proud of you; hang in there..
Aww feel better! I hate how when I’m depressed, I pick a useless fight with my boyfriend, which leads to more awful feeling.
On the bright side, now you have an awesome new job with less of a commute so more time to take care of yourself! I hope you kick this knee pain thing soon.
Some things do take time and they are so horrible. I`m sorry for you. There is still time and I`m sure and hope that you will feel much better very soon.
Don’t panic! You are doing so well in the other sports, let the knee issue resolve itself while you become a monster on the swim/bike! I broke my foot in IM training and only ran for 6 weeks before my ironman, the first two weeks being only 3-4 miles every other day. I guarantee it did not affect my race one bit, and possibly made me stronger in the other sports.
I’m sorry you are going through this, though. Knowing that it will be ok doesn’t really make it suck less right now.
Really sorry you are going through this! Injuries are the major pits, but I also think they are amazing lessons for most of us…once we get through them we train smarter and rekindle our love for what we get to do.
hugs.