The Fourth Trimester

The the fourth trimester is nearing its end and it’s no exaggeration when I say that it’s been the most life-changing three months of my life.

Who would have ever thought that a 9 pound 1 ounce little chunk of love could come into our lives and make us learn something new every single day? Every day I wake up with an idea of how the day will go, but rarely does it ever go according to plan. Instead, we pivot. We try, and sometimes we succeed and often we fail, but along the way we are learning and surviving, loving and obsessing.

And that’s the funny thing about having a baby — everything that I thought I would be has pivoted. As a type-A planner that usually has a spreadsheet to go with every milestone, it’s the type of change and unruliness that doesn’t come with a manual or allow for methodical planning. It’s been messy and I’ve cried more times than I care to count (for both the good and the bad), but here’s the crazy thing: I’m more ok with it then I ever thought I would be. In fact, I kind of like the mess.

My sleep is still terrible.
My pre-pregnancy pants don’t fit.
My running is maxed out at 4 miles.
My hair is in a perpetual top-knot.
My daily wardrobe consists of tights and a tank top.
My house could use a deep clean.
My fridge is empty.
My dog could use a walk.
My house has atrocious looking toys lined up and down the walls.
My mind is racing a million miles an hour, thinking about anything and everything.

But then that smile. It just takes one and ***POOF*** all of that “stuff” — that mess that really doesn’t matter — fades to the background. I knew I would like being a mom, but I never fathomed how much I love being a mom. What have I become?!?!

So now, here we are, almost three months in. My little family is more important to me than ever. My husband is shining in his new role as a dad. And I have more appreciation for my mom and parents everywhere.

Is this cheesiness gagging you yet? Well it should because it used to gag me too until I lived it. Now you just are going to have to deal with my hormones still in overdrive or just click out of this browser. Problem solved.

Do I overshare about my kid? You better believe it. But I’ve fully embraced being “THAT” mom. Because that whole saying about “The days are long but the years are short…” well, I feel like I already get it.

My Insta is filled with photos as I continue on my photo a day challenge, and as I scroll through my feed, I find myself saying, “Oh my God. Look how tiny he was!” and “I remember that!”

I hope sharing the highs, the lows, and the continual pivoting that we’re learning to do as parents can shed a bit of help and humor to other parents out there. And don’t worry, the running talk will be back soon. Slowly but surely.

A quick update on the little man: he’s smiling, cooing, and drooling like a champ. He’s happiest in the mornings and loves when we have “Coffee Talk” in the afternoons. He’s a regular at Philz Coffee and has made some great baby friends through our mommy group. He’s been to wineries, breweries, swim school, the trails, the track, and more. He’s starting to travel, including a trip to Pacific Grove, over the hill to Reno twice, and his first flight to Sedona coming soon. He’s still a big fan of the boob and is settling into a sleep pattern (sleeping 6-10 hour stretches at night). He’s weighing in at over 15 pounds now (!!!) and in the 90th percentile for everything. He loves being held and I’m a sucker for holding him. His thighs are squishy, his belly is big, and has his mom and dad wrapped around his tiny little fingers.